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open_flameCharacter: Liz Sherman
Fandom: Hellboy
Rating: R (Language, Violence, Implied Sexual Content)
Word Count: 2,589
Setting:Twitterverse
AN: Twitter Canon, NOT Shades Canon. They are two very different canons. Especially where Jack is concerned. Hellboy's version of these events is here.
I nodded softly to the attendant at the Company car park as I signed the release. My new boss, Angela Petrelli had insisted I use a Company car for my trip to Jersey. I didn’t tell her why I was going, and she didn’t ask. She was so very different from Sylar. It was almost strange the way I missed working for him; the way he seemed to understand me even though he’d only known me a few months.
Sylar would have asked, and I would have told him everything. How Jack coming back into my life again made it all topsy turvy, how I had my belt converted into a watch to make myself feel better about not loving Red, how I was fighting for control of my fire every second of every minute of every day… my fire that was for some reason, changing.
Syalr would have listened, Sylar would have cared, Sylar would have known exactly what to say, but we just never seemed to cross paths anymore. I was avoiding work. And he was…. dealing with his own things.
Kitty was calling me all the time. “Liz, how are you?”, “Liz, I miss you. Why are you working at the Company still?”, “Liz, let me tell you about my day.” It about drove me crazy; more so because I know I was doing the exact same thing to my friends. Well not so much friends but anyone I could nail down longer than 5 minutes to listen to me babble.
I couldn’t sleep, I barely ate, I was living off coffee, cigarettes and sheer force of will. I was quite simply, a complete mess.
I stared at the line of headlight on the freeway as I made my way to Newark, to BPRD. I wasn’t looking forward to it, but it had to be done. That last encounter with Red was, too friendly. I could see that little glimmer of hope in his eyes that I would eventually be coming back. I wouldn’t, I couldn’t. Not this time. Not ever again.
I parked the car in guest parking and looked up at the roof, half expecting Red to be staring down on my when I arrived. I was late, and I knew he would worry.
I blew out a breath of air as the lift lowered me to the basement. No one seemed to notice I was even there. One of the black suited Feds finally nodded at me. “Ms. Sherman.” He said simply as he passed me briskly. God it was so weird not being an agent anymore. I felt like part of me was dead.
I sucked down another smoke as I ascended the stairs to the roof. I moved quickly at first taking the steps two at a time. As I got closer and closer to the roof though, my pace slowed. One at a time, and eventually I stopped on each step with both feet for a moment, silently willing myself to keep moving upward.
I had to be clear with Red, make sure there was no gray area. I was not coming back, not now, not ever again, and I did not, I could not love him as anything more than I friend.
That day in Russia flashed in my mind. God, it was such a mistake. I was running on pure adrenaline, I’d just had my soul sucked out of me and put back. It was…stressful was too weak of a work. There Red was, just looking at me, my hero.
I knew it was a mistake the second his lips hit mine. I just needed to be sure I was alive, I needed to feel something. Why couldn’t it have been Meyers standing there, or Abe, or even….
I scoffed out loud when my mind flipped to Jack. He confused me so much. I’ve known him since I was 12, my entire adult life. I knew him longer than I knew Red, longer than I knew Abe, longer than I knew anyone else, really. I wouldn’t even be at BPRD if it wasn’t for him finding me that day in Kansas after I….killed everyone.
Somehow every time I left BPRD, Jack showed up again. It was like he was checking up on me. It would have been really very creepy if it weren’t him. Instead, it was sweet. I had the sneaking suspicion that Prof. Broom had put him up to it after the first time I ran away. The fact that Broom was now dead didn’t seem to stop Jack from showing up again. God, how self-centered is that? Like he was actually actively looking for me. Jack was probably in New York by coincidence, being a hero saving the world from some unknown secret…thing. Just like we do at BPRD. Did, just like we did. I shook my head; not an agent anymore Liz. That’s is what you wanted, remember?
I was just counting my blessings that this time wasn’t like the last time I ran into Jack. God, I was so depressed…so lonely. I got so very drunk. Scotch is never a good thing, even if it was my birthday.
I stamped out my smoke and tossed it in the bin, surprised at how empty it was. There were a few cigar ends but no cigarettes like when I was here. Red must be coming to the roof more often. It made me sad, the roof was always our place, and the place we went to avoid everyone. The thought of him being up here all-alone was heartbreaking. I took a deep breath and opened the door.
“Hey, Kid” Red didn’t look at me, he just stood there staring out at the world, looking down at the city that would never accept him as anything but a freak, a monster.
“Hey, Red.” I choked on the words a bit. I had no idea what to say, no idea where to even begin, no idea how he was going to react. I knew it wouldn’t be good but would he be sad, would he be angry, would he be mean. I had no idea.
“You wanted to talk?” He sounded like her had rehearsed that line, like he’s been thinking about this for some time.
I took a few steps forward, my boots rustling the gravel like they always did when I was literally dragging my feet. “Yeah, I do.” I said simply as I dug in my purse for the watch I had Gabriel Gray make for him. My BPRD belt buckle, the perfect size for a pocket watch for Red. I knew I wouldn’t need the buckle anymore, and I hoped Red would understand the sentiment behind it. He was never very good at taking hints though.
“Got you a present.” I held up the box to him and forced a smile. “That’s why I’m late, had to find a box for it.”
I hated lying to him. I was late because I had spent 30 minutes parked on the side of the interstate, screaming crying and trying not to go up in flames. I had to be calm; I couldn’t be emotional when I talked to Red. I would say or do things I might regret again otherwise.
“Not my birthday,” His eyes darted from me to the box and back again. I took a deep breath and tried not to snark at him. I had to be as clear as possible.
“I know, I just…feel like I owe you for…everything.” Nice one, Liz. That was about as clear as mud. I scolded myself. I was such a spaz when I was nervous. Just take the hint, Red. I hoped. Just nod and say thank you and be pleasant. Don’t make me explain what I mean, I don’t even know if I can.
“What everything?” He said with a raise of his eyebrow.
Son of a….
“You know, ”I stalled, trying to find the right words. “I left and you didn’t freak out too bad or anything so…” I trailed off. His gaze left mine, he was just vacantly staring off somewhere, lost in thought. I wanted to think it was good thoughts, but I knew him better than that.
“Here, take it!” I could think of nothing else to say to snap him out of it. He looked down at me, almost confused. “I had it made just for you. The guy is….amazing. Most talented watchmaker I have ever seen. Not that I’ve seen a lot,” God, I ramble when I am nervous. I laughed softly and tried to sound a bit less frantic “He’s just really great and her worked really hard and….”
“FINE!” I let out a soft eep when he yelled. Perfect, I’d gone ahead and pissed him off. I tried not to flinch as he grabbed the box form my hands. He opened it, stared down at it for a second and snapped the lid closed, looking very upset as an almost menacing noise escaped his throat. “A watch. Thanks.” I pursed my lips as I waited for him to say something more, preparing for a barrage of anger.
“Liz, your belt! What the fuck did you do to your belt!?” I watched the box tremor in his hands and quickly snatched it back after he finally spoke. This was not the reaction I was hoping for, but it wasn’t unexpected, not entirely.
”I don’t need it anymore, so I figured I’d make sure you never forget me.” It was the truth. Plus, having that belt around held to many memories. I had buried the rest of my past deep in the back of my closet, but the belt, that belt, the one that only Red, Abe and I had for some reason haunted me. I didn’t want it around, even if I couldn’t see it.
I gently placed the box back in his hands and pressed his fingers around it with mine, hoping he would understand what my intent was. He didn’t even look at me. God, why won’t he look at me? This is so hard, I feel like I’m going to explode.
“We get along fine without you.” He said coldly. “Not like you were an integral part of the team. We got a new equipment guy, and a flame-thrower. We’re all set.”
If his intent was to hurt me, he was doing a great job. I crumpled my face as I tried to think of a proper response. If he wanted to be mean; I could be too.
“Good to see you’re so broken up about it, Red.” I held back what I really wanted to say. I shouldn’t have, but I did. I can be a bigger person; I don’t need cheap shots to get my point across.
“We got a job to do.” He glared at me, his eyes glowing with disapproval “We can’t just fall to pieces every time Elizabeth decided she can’t take it with the freaks anymore. We’re all used to you leaving and coming back.” He let out a sharp laugh.
He laughed at me. Laughed! This was all just a big joke to him. I was trying to be honest and spare his feelings and he laughed in my face, he didn’t even care!
”I’m not coming back!” I raised my voice and pretended I was confident “I like my job, I like my friends and I like New York.” I knew I was lying. It was all I could do some days to not come crawling back and beg Manning for my old job just to try and get back to the way things were. That was not possible, though. “I’m staying there.” I fought back tears.
”Must be a pretty cherry deal working for a serial killer.” He shot back. That’s it! I thought. I was so sick of everyone badmouthing Sylar. I was so tired of having to explain to everyone I that he just wasn’t that way anymore. I stood silently, again trying to find the right words. Sylar wasn’t even my boss anymore but I felt this pressing need to defend him. He was my friend. I had to defend him.
“So what is it you do exactly for this Sylar?” Red pressed on, his voice dripping with sarcasm and malice. “Clean the bloody knives, coordinate the alibis?”
Just let it go, Liz. He doesn’t mean it, he’s just shooting his mouth off. Just…let it go.
“Oh, I know!” I looked up at him as he spoke. “You’re in charge of cremating the bodies. You’re right, that is a….”
Something in me snapped, and my hand was enveloped in orange flames before I even realized I had moved to strike him. I’d never hit him before, never felt the desire for him to be in physical pain, but the way he was hurting me right then. I wanted him to hurt I wanted him to know just what a bastard he was being.
“Fuck you, Red!” I screamed, almost not believing the words had come out of my mouth. it was rather logical though. I was more and more angry on a daily basis and a breakdown of civilized language was a natural part of anger.
“Liz!?!” He scolded me, like I was some kind of misbehaving child.
“What?” I shot back. “Not like you never say “fuck”, Red.” I was so angry with him. How dare he insult my friends, how dare he insult me, after everything we had been though together. He was my best friend…was, not anymore.
“What the hell, Liz!” He continued his voice raised “You’re swearing, your fires orange you look like death and you’re fucking hitting people now?” He stepped in front of me and looked me in the eyes with a cruel smirk. “What’s next; you gonna start trolling bars and blowing random guys just because you’re lonely?”
My eyes widened and my good sense seemed to just vanish. I drew back and sucker punched Red before I even realized I was doing it. Shit, that hurt. My hand was a lot softer than his rock of a head.
“Don’t you dare talk about shit you don’t understand.” That night…my birthday…too much scotch. Jack was just…. irresistible, for some reason. I still felt horrible about it, sometimes. Other times….I wasn’t even sure what I was feeling.
“Don’t…you…dare.” I almost started crying. Red had no way of knowing, did he? I hadn’t breathed a word of it to anyone in Jersey, and though Jack shot his mouth off that one time to Sylar, I doubt news traveled that fast.
“You’d better get home.” He growled at me. I knew he was right. This was going nowhere and at this rate I’d burn BPRD to a pile of ashes if I got any more upset. No sense in us continuing to sling low blows and insults. He made his point, and I never wanted to see him again, frankly.
“I think I’d better go, too.” I looked at my hand and let the orange flames crawl back into it. So much for letting him down nice and easy. I shuddered and fought back tears. “Bye, Red.” I moved towards the door, not sure if I should hit him again. He deserved it. He deserved it for making me hurt so badly. “Hope you like the watch.” I opened the door and never looked back.
Fandom: Hellboy
Rating: R (Language, Violence, Implied Sexual Content)
Word Count: 2,589
Setting:Twitterverse
AN: Twitter Canon, NOT Shades Canon. They are two very different canons. Especially where Jack is concerned. Hellboy's version of these events is here.
I nodded softly to the attendant at the Company car park as I signed the release. My new boss, Angela Petrelli had insisted I use a Company car for my trip to Jersey. I didn’t tell her why I was going, and she didn’t ask. She was so very different from Sylar. It was almost strange the way I missed working for him; the way he seemed to understand me even though he’d only known me a few months.
Sylar would have asked, and I would have told him everything. How Jack coming back into my life again made it all topsy turvy, how I had my belt converted into a watch to make myself feel better about not loving Red, how I was fighting for control of my fire every second of every minute of every day… my fire that was for some reason, changing.
Syalr would have listened, Sylar would have cared, Sylar would have known exactly what to say, but we just never seemed to cross paths anymore. I was avoiding work. And he was…. dealing with his own things.
Kitty was calling me all the time. “Liz, how are you?”, “Liz, I miss you. Why are you working at the Company still?”, “Liz, let me tell you about my day.” It about drove me crazy; more so because I know I was doing the exact same thing to my friends. Well not so much friends but anyone I could nail down longer than 5 minutes to listen to me babble.
I couldn’t sleep, I barely ate, I was living off coffee, cigarettes and sheer force of will. I was quite simply, a complete mess.
I stared at the line of headlight on the freeway as I made my way to Newark, to BPRD. I wasn’t looking forward to it, but it had to be done. That last encounter with Red was, too friendly. I could see that little glimmer of hope in his eyes that I would eventually be coming back. I wouldn’t, I couldn’t. Not this time. Not ever again.
I parked the car in guest parking and looked up at the roof, half expecting Red to be staring down on my when I arrived. I was late, and I knew he would worry.
I blew out a breath of air as the lift lowered me to the basement. No one seemed to notice I was even there. One of the black suited Feds finally nodded at me. “Ms. Sherman.” He said simply as he passed me briskly. God it was so weird not being an agent anymore. I felt like part of me was dead.
I sucked down another smoke as I ascended the stairs to the roof. I moved quickly at first taking the steps two at a time. As I got closer and closer to the roof though, my pace slowed. One at a time, and eventually I stopped on each step with both feet for a moment, silently willing myself to keep moving upward.
I had to be clear with Red, make sure there was no gray area. I was not coming back, not now, not ever again, and I did not, I could not love him as anything more than I friend.
That day in Russia flashed in my mind. God, it was such a mistake. I was running on pure adrenaline, I’d just had my soul sucked out of me and put back. It was…stressful was too weak of a work. There Red was, just looking at me, my hero.
I knew it was a mistake the second his lips hit mine. I just needed to be sure I was alive, I needed to feel something. Why couldn’t it have been Meyers standing there, or Abe, or even….
I scoffed out loud when my mind flipped to Jack. He confused me so much. I’ve known him since I was 12, my entire adult life. I knew him longer than I knew Red, longer than I knew Abe, longer than I knew anyone else, really. I wouldn’t even be at BPRD if it wasn’t for him finding me that day in Kansas after I….killed everyone.
Somehow every time I left BPRD, Jack showed up again. It was like he was checking up on me. It would have been really very creepy if it weren’t him. Instead, it was sweet. I had the sneaking suspicion that Prof. Broom had put him up to it after the first time I ran away. The fact that Broom was now dead didn’t seem to stop Jack from showing up again. God, how self-centered is that? Like he was actually actively looking for me. Jack was probably in New York by coincidence, being a hero saving the world from some unknown secret…thing. Just like we do at BPRD. Did, just like we did. I shook my head; not an agent anymore Liz. That’s is what you wanted, remember?
I was just counting my blessings that this time wasn’t like the last time I ran into Jack. God, I was so depressed…so lonely. I got so very drunk. Scotch is never a good thing, even if it was my birthday.
I stamped out my smoke and tossed it in the bin, surprised at how empty it was. There were a few cigar ends but no cigarettes like when I was here. Red must be coming to the roof more often. It made me sad, the roof was always our place, and the place we went to avoid everyone. The thought of him being up here all-alone was heartbreaking. I took a deep breath and opened the door.
“Hey, Kid” Red didn’t look at me, he just stood there staring out at the world, looking down at the city that would never accept him as anything but a freak, a monster.
“Hey, Red.” I choked on the words a bit. I had no idea what to say, no idea where to even begin, no idea how he was going to react. I knew it wouldn’t be good but would he be sad, would he be angry, would he be mean. I had no idea.
“You wanted to talk?” He sounded like her had rehearsed that line, like he’s been thinking about this for some time.
I took a few steps forward, my boots rustling the gravel like they always did when I was literally dragging my feet. “Yeah, I do.” I said simply as I dug in my purse for the watch I had Gabriel Gray make for him. My BPRD belt buckle, the perfect size for a pocket watch for Red. I knew I wouldn’t need the buckle anymore, and I hoped Red would understand the sentiment behind it. He was never very good at taking hints though.
“Got you a present.” I held up the box to him and forced a smile. “That’s why I’m late, had to find a box for it.”
I hated lying to him. I was late because I had spent 30 minutes parked on the side of the interstate, screaming crying and trying not to go up in flames. I had to be calm; I couldn’t be emotional when I talked to Red. I would say or do things I might regret again otherwise.
“Not my birthday,” His eyes darted from me to the box and back again. I took a deep breath and tried not to snark at him. I had to be as clear as possible.
“I know, I just…feel like I owe you for…everything.” Nice one, Liz. That was about as clear as mud. I scolded myself. I was such a spaz when I was nervous. Just take the hint, Red. I hoped. Just nod and say thank you and be pleasant. Don’t make me explain what I mean, I don’t even know if I can.
“What everything?” He said with a raise of his eyebrow.
Son of a….
“You know, ”I stalled, trying to find the right words. “I left and you didn’t freak out too bad or anything so…” I trailed off. His gaze left mine, he was just vacantly staring off somewhere, lost in thought. I wanted to think it was good thoughts, but I knew him better than that.
“Here, take it!” I could think of nothing else to say to snap him out of it. He looked down at me, almost confused. “I had it made just for you. The guy is….amazing. Most talented watchmaker I have ever seen. Not that I’ve seen a lot,” God, I ramble when I am nervous. I laughed softly and tried to sound a bit less frantic “He’s just really great and her worked really hard and….”
“FINE!” I let out a soft eep when he yelled. Perfect, I’d gone ahead and pissed him off. I tried not to flinch as he grabbed the box form my hands. He opened it, stared down at it for a second and snapped the lid closed, looking very upset as an almost menacing noise escaped his throat. “A watch. Thanks.” I pursed my lips as I waited for him to say something more, preparing for a barrage of anger.
“Liz, your belt! What the fuck did you do to your belt!?” I watched the box tremor in his hands and quickly snatched it back after he finally spoke. This was not the reaction I was hoping for, but it wasn’t unexpected, not entirely.
”I don’t need it anymore, so I figured I’d make sure you never forget me.” It was the truth. Plus, having that belt around held to many memories. I had buried the rest of my past deep in the back of my closet, but the belt, that belt, the one that only Red, Abe and I had for some reason haunted me. I didn’t want it around, even if I couldn’t see it.
I gently placed the box back in his hands and pressed his fingers around it with mine, hoping he would understand what my intent was. He didn’t even look at me. God, why won’t he look at me? This is so hard, I feel like I’m going to explode.
“We get along fine without you.” He said coldly. “Not like you were an integral part of the team. We got a new equipment guy, and a flame-thrower. We’re all set.”
If his intent was to hurt me, he was doing a great job. I crumpled my face as I tried to think of a proper response. If he wanted to be mean; I could be too.
“Good to see you’re so broken up about it, Red.” I held back what I really wanted to say. I shouldn’t have, but I did. I can be a bigger person; I don’t need cheap shots to get my point across.
“We got a job to do.” He glared at me, his eyes glowing with disapproval “We can’t just fall to pieces every time Elizabeth decided she can’t take it with the freaks anymore. We’re all used to you leaving and coming back.” He let out a sharp laugh.
He laughed at me. Laughed! This was all just a big joke to him. I was trying to be honest and spare his feelings and he laughed in my face, he didn’t even care!
”I’m not coming back!” I raised my voice and pretended I was confident “I like my job, I like my friends and I like New York.” I knew I was lying. It was all I could do some days to not come crawling back and beg Manning for my old job just to try and get back to the way things were. That was not possible, though. “I’m staying there.” I fought back tears.
”Must be a pretty cherry deal working for a serial killer.” He shot back. That’s it! I thought. I was so sick of everyone badmouthing Sylar. I was so tired of having to explain to everyone I that he just wasn’t that way anymore. I stood silently, again trying to find the right words. Sylar wasn’t even my boss anymore but I felt this pressing need to defend him. He was my friend. I had to defend him.
“So what is it you do exactly for this Sylar?” Red pressed on, his voice dripping with sarcasm and malice. “Clean the bloody knives, coordinate the alibis?”
Just let it go, Liz. He doesn’t mean it, he’s just shooting his mouth off. Just…let it go.
“Oh, I know!” I looked up at him as he spoke. “You’re in charge of cremating the bodies. You’re right, that is a….”
Something in me snapped, and my hand was enveloped in orange flames before I even realized I had moved to strike him. I’d never hit him before, never felt the desire for him to be in physical pain, but the way he was hurting me right then. I wanted him to hurt I wanted him to know just what a bastard he was being.
“Fuck you, Red!” I screamed, almost not believing the words had come out of my mouth. it was rather logical though. I was more and more angry on a daily basis and a breakdown of civilized language was a natural part of anger.
“Liz!?!” He scolded me, like I was some kind of misbehaving child.
“What?” I shot back. “Not like you never say “fuck”, Red.” I was so angry with him. How dare he insult my friends, how dare he insult me, after everything we had been though together. He was my best friend…was, not anymore.
“What the hell, Liz!” He continued his voice raised “You’re swearing, your fires orange you look like death and you’re fucking hitting people now?” He stepped in front of me and looked me in the eyes with a cruel smirk. “What’s next; you gonna start trolling bars and blowing random guys just because you’re lonely?”
My eyes widened and my good sense seemed to just vanish. I drew back and sucker punched Red before I even realized I was doing it. Shit, that hurt. My hand was a lot softer than his rock of a head.
“Don’t you dare talk about shit you don’t understand.” That night…my birthday…too much scotch. Jack was just…. irresistible, for some reason. I still felt horrible about it, sometimes. Other times….I wasn’t even sure what I was feeling.
“Don’t…you…dare.” I almost started crying. Red had no way of knowing, did he? I hadn’t breathed a word of it to anyone in Jersey, and though Jack shot his mouth off that one time to Sylar, I doubt news traveled that fast.
“You’d better get home.” He growled at me. I knew he was right. This was going nowhere and at this rate I’d burn BPRD to a pile of ashes if I got any more upset. No sense in us continuing to sling low blows and insults. He made his point, and I never wanted to see him again, frankly.
“I think I’d better go, too.” I looked at my hand and let the orange flames crawl back into it. So much for letting him down nice and easy. I shuddered and fought back tears. “Bye, Red.” I moved towards the door, not sure if I should hit him again. He deserved it. He deserved it for making me hurt so badly. “Hope you like the watch.” I opened the door and never looked back.
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